Smacking you in the face with my glove

I propose a new contest:

He who dies with the most T-Shirts, wins

free t shirts from athletic events, of course. I had this idea when I went to the pool to soak my legs because of running, a nice, easy, 20 minute cool down. But the girl working there says I get a free t shirt if I swim 233 laps, in honor of the Marine Corps' 233 birthday. I'm a sucker for t shirts, girls, and absurd and impromptu athletic challenges, so I signed up and set a modest goal of 50 laps for the day. This was a mere 5 times the most laps I had done since...senior year of high school. But who cares, I did it in just over an hour(This, after running 10 miles an hour earlier, and then playing 1 hour of intense basketball, at which I dominated(gangly arms are a plus)) Since then I've done 100 more, I plan to finish tomorrow and get my t shirt, and then sport it all over base.

So do everything and everything to get t shirts, medals of course have the 'bling' factor, but I don't like to do laundry so many shirts comes in handy.